Five lessons I learned last week…

I just wrapped up two days at the very first open Brilliant Balance Live event, and my heart is so full.

That’s right - last week, women from all over the US took time out of their incredibly busy schedules to spend time with me and my team. And I was so humbled.

I could never have imagined this back in February of 2010, when I was sitting at a makeshift desk in my kitchen typing out my very first blog post, wondering if anyone besides my mom would read it.

I took time this weekend to reflect on my takeaways from the event, and it occurred to me that  you might find them worthwhile, too.

, Five lessons I learned last week…

So here they are, my Top 5 Takeaways from Brilliant Balance Live:

 

1. There is nothing - absolutely nothing - like being in a room surrounded by like-minded, high-vibe women.

The truth is, we're all a little lonely. I mean, we’re in touch more than ever via social media and we have brief conversations all day about the kids' sports or the Vineyard Vines line coming to Target (May 18th y’all), but that’s where it ends. A text or a like or a funny .gif in the comments. We’re not GATHERING in person.

Yet when we do? It’s darn near magical.

At this event, the buzz in the room was palpable from minute one and it built throughout the day. As we listened and talked and laughed and cried and danced and hugged and shared stories and experiences, we were reminded of what it feels like to be a part of something bigger than ourselves. By the time we were clinking champagne flutes at the cocktail hour, we were a TRIBE.

When we gather women together... when we give them a reason to do their hair and put on a cute dress...when we feed them chocolate and champagne…when we give them a break from the grind...we remind them of what joy feels like. We let them dance with it and put it in their pocket and take it home with them.

When we’re together, we raise each other’s vibe.

And we could all use a little more of that.

 

2. Balance is an outdated goal. What we really want is brilliance.

A lot of us have been fed a steady diet of work life balance training. We’ve been to seminars, have been matched with mentors, and have looked at more PowerPoint slides than we can count showing perfectly balanced scales with rocks piled on each side.

But here’s the thing. The whole idea of balance is outdated.

It’s a static word. It implies that balance is something we can attain... and then if we just hold our breath and don’t move a muscle maybe we can sustain it. But who wants to live like THAT?!

What we actually crave are PEAK MOMENTS - moments where we can strike a pose and strut our stuff - moments where we SHINE - or where we’re so fully in the moment that we lose track of time. We’re willing to tolerate a lot of hard work in between as long as we know these moments are coming.

When we get to watch our daughter land her roundoff-back-tuck in competition. Or when we land the client we’ve been chasing for a year.

When we get the job. Or the house. Or the sign from above that we’re on the right path.

And these moments come readily when we stand in our own brilliance.  When we bring something magnificent to the world with courage.

We all want to dwell in possibility, to dream bigger, and to know what it would feel like to make our dreams reality.

 

3. We need more silence.

At several points during the event, we gave everyone the chance to be silent. We had journaling prompts and reflection time, not to mention an extraordinary meditation session.

I think we all need more silence. More opportunities to tune into inner wisdom. More chances to take all the stimulus away and just be.

But we’re living in a noisy world and we resist silence. Maybe we’re afraid of what we'll find there. But what we will ALWAYS find there is ourselves.

Through meditation, prayer, stillness, or even sleep, we find ourselves. And the kind of silence that leads us back to ourselves is golden.

 

4. We spend too much time DOING all the things and not enough time making sure we’re doing the RIGHT things.

The women in the room last week were all unquestionably bright, accomplished, and ambitious.

Yet they arrived feeling foggy. Muddled. Unclear about their direction. Not sure what was missing (but sure that something was).

You know why? Because we’re all so busy DOING that we’re not spending any time making sure we feel good about WHAT we’re doing.

We need to spend more time thinking, clarifying our vision, and planning. Most of us spend more time planning a vacation than we do planning our lives. And this is a real problem.  Having dedicated time to think and to plan is a game changer. The women at the event experienced it first hand during the workshops and you could SEE the clarity it provided.

When you pick your head up for a minute and stop spinning your wheels, your future will come into focus right before your very eyes.

 

5. We are closer than we think to everything we want.

At some point during the first day, one of the women at the event  came up to me and said “I wish every woman here could see that she is SO MUCH CLOSER than she thinks to everything she wants.”

My response? “I KNOW!”

WIth the benefit of outside perspective, it’s so clear that just a few shifts and intentional actions can change the trajectory of your life. I see it every day when someone connects the dots between where she is and where she wants to be. Those two points plot a course forward and give us a path to follow.

The road from here to there is almost always shorter and easier than you think. But you can’t get there until you take the first step.

Brilliant Balance Live was such an extraordinary reminder of how much inherent potential exists within each of us. It was an experience I won’t soon forget.

In fact, I’m kind of ready to do it again…;)

 

Do you understand how close you are to everything you want? All you need to do is talk with someone who can help you get there. Book a call and let’s chat.

 

 

Follow me on Instagram @cskolnicki and @brilliant_balance

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